50

chapter 49

Mishka pov.....

I was preparing breakfast and Maa was clearing the bills for the laundry and Milk as it's the end of the month ..

Abhiii.....uth gya beta tu .....I heard maa and walked out of the kitchen to find him sitting beside Maa in his casual clothes.

He must be having a hangover.....I thought ,as  he was massaging the side of his head .

I prepared a lemonade and took a disprin from the first aid box and approached him .
He didn't make any move to take the glass or the pill and just ignored me .

Take it beta .....don't behave like a spolied kid. It's normal to have arguments but look she bought you tablet and lemonade to cure your headache......Maa said and made him have them.

I know he is hurt with me and I need to clear out things with him at the earliest....I can take his silent treatment anymore.

Maa breakfast ready hai aap log aa jao .....I said to her and she nodded .
I served him as usual and he just sat there without uttering anything.

We had our breakfast silently and no one uttered anything.
Dekho beta ......you both are mature adults now . I have been observing you both from last 4-5 days and It's high time you both resolve your issue.

I didn't want to interfere in between your matter as I trust you both . But things needs to be resolved at the earliest.
Streching a fight will cause more hurt and misunderstandings only ....Maa said and he just sighed .

Maa patted my cheek giving me a small smile and I blinked my eyes at her.
He left to the room and I followed him after telling Rani Di what she needs to cook for the lunch ..

He was laying on the bed with his eyes closed when I entred the room.
I took a deep breath and slowly stepped closer to the bed and sat beside him .

He sensed my presence but didn't opend his eyes .
Sarr mei abhi bhi dard hai kya. .......shall I give you a massage.....I asked to initiate a conversation.

He turned his face to me making me bit my lip to held back the sob ..
I know aap mujhse bohot naraz hai ......but please give me a chance to explain myself.

I am really sorry for hurting you unintentionally but I was myself caught in a delimma.....I continued knowing that he is listening.

Mujhe pehle nahi pata tha Pooja k parents k baare mei ....I got to know about it later only  ....
But Pooja made me promise that I would keep it to myself only .....she was so broken and vulnerable at that time and wanted me to keep it to myself.

Usne Sunny Bhai ko bhi nahi bataya ....she trusted me with her secret.....asse mei aap hi batao mei kya karti ......I said and he sat up on the bed and looked at me with hard face .

She was broken ....she was vulnerable and what about me . Didn't you know that Your friend wasn't the only one affected by that case . Aur bhi log the jinki life badal gai uss case k baad.......haan....when it came to putting on the blames....you went on cursing me .......but sach batane ki baari aai toh promise nahi Tod Sakti thi .

Kya tumhara promise kisi ki suffering se bada tha .....haan ....
And then you claim that you love me ....
Ye kesa pyar hai Mishika  that allowed you to see me in pain but you can't break the promise made to your friend.....he said holding my arm and I just sobbed silently.

I am sorry.....but I was afraid of your reaction.......aap uske parents ko confront karne jaate ya case ko re-open karte and Pooja didn't want any of it that time .....she was very depressed and traumatized....

And it's her personal secret.....I know aur bhi log the uss case se jude hue and even I was the one ......but we can't change the fact that she was the one who was the victim....jiske saath sabse jayda bura hua .....

You were heartbroken kuki aapko aapki girlfriend ne dhoka diya but she got betrayed by her parents Abhimanyu...

I am not saying that your sufferings were any less but they can't be compared with Pooja's.

I am really sorry......meri aapko hurt karne ki koi intention nahi thi ...... Please.....Abhimanyu mujhse asse dur mat rahiye......I cried and he just held his head in between his palms and let out a painful groan ..

I am not in a state to understand anything right now ......I am already messed up in my head and nothing is helping out at this moment.....he said frustrated.

He got up from the bed and left to the closet while I sat there not knowing what I should do and weeped silently.
He came out changing his clothes and picked up his car keys and Mobil phone.

Kaha Jaa rahe hai aap ......I asked him getting up but he didn't answered me .
Abhimanyu.....I held his hand and he looked at me blankly..

I need time and space Mishka....I hope I am Asking for too much .......He said and Silent tears flowed out of my eyes.

I know and I am ready to give you as much time and space you want ......but I fear if this space will make us distant and we might never be able to fill it up ......I said .

You think mei Shreya k paas vapas chala jaaunga ......He asked looking into my eyes taking me off guard.
He chuckled bitterly freeing his hand from my hold .

Love without trust ....
Love that allows to see the loved one suffer ....
A love that lacks faith ......
A relationship that is so weak that a mere misunderstanding has the potential to uproot it ......he said giving me a sad smile.

I don't want this kind of Love Mishika....I never wanted this ......
And I know you still don't trust me so let me clear your doubts...

Pooja's parents didn't tell me anything new that I didn't knew about Shreya......she herself came to inform me all of it .....but still a betrayal is betrayal for me .

Fighting goons and criminals is part of my job . I have got a number Of death threats from different kinds of people and I am capable of handling it on my own .

She didn't trusted me enough and you are doing the same .
When I told you I will never bring my past in between I meant those words .....When I told you I will try to normalise our marriage as much as I could.....I meant it .

Life and marriages doesn't work like that .....aaj shaadi kar li kal ko ex waapis aa gai so you move back to her .

I am a men of my words and I stand by them even if everything and everyone is against it .

And my life and whatever happened with me or what I was going through.... everything was transparent to you .

Mene tumse pyar k juthe vaade kar k shaddi nahi ki thi ....I was real and clear from the beginning.

But it's you and rest of others including my family my best friend who thinks that it's easy to forget someone whom you have loved like anything.

Khud p baat aati hai tab pata lagta hai ....mei toh phir bhi tumhare liye bohot aage bhad gya ........leaving my past ....

You know me from how much time ......less than 2 years and claim that you will die without me .......
Tumhara pyar assa hai toh kya Mera pyar ek majak tha .....

Riddhima, sunny and you .....you need to ask yourself.....ki kya tum log move on kar paaoge.....

I am here still fucking trying to give you everything going beyond my limits.
But my efforts doesn't matter ......
They don't......
I should get over thinks in a blink.... because I am supposed to be strong and tough ....... because I am a fucking men .

Sabke saamne rota nahi hu that doesn't mean I am am not breaking inside .
It kills you to suppress all your emotions inside you and act strong .

I was shattered but still I myself came forward to marry you ......kya mujhe nahi pata tha mei kya kar Raha hu ......

Am I a fucking fool to you who would marry someone just like that when he is betrayed brutally by the girl he loved madly for 7 fucking years .

Phir bhi mene back out nahi Kiya and never used my heartbreak as an excuse to not fulfill my duties as a husband.

Mei sab kar Raha tha ......I was doing everything....jisse tum khus raho ......sab khus rahe....I was trying to create a happy family for you ......I stated to feel at peace too.....inn sab mei apni khusi bhi dhund raha tha.....tumhare saath khus ho raha tha .....

I have started to heal but No  thats not enough.....it's never enough.
And Now I have had enough of everything......

Itna karne k baad bhi here you are standing in front of me with doubt filled eyes .
Again proving how I am a failure again.

I cleared things to you time and again.....ki Mishika mei loyal rahunga .... Mishika....hum normal couple rahenge .....Mishika mei ye karunga ....but no you didn't trusted any thing......

Now I don't want to clarify any thing.......You can think whatever you want.....mere baare mei jisko jo sochna hai they are free to think ......
Because I am done proving my self every fucking time .......He said with eyes filled with painful tears and It broke my heart to see him like this .....

I have hurt him even more .........
I just cried seeing him like this ....and he left slamming the door and I fell on my knees crying..

Abhimanyu......I am sorry....I am sorry please........

🤧🤧🤧
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